I started trembling. I stood up and started walking in the woods. Soon she was along by my side. She caught my hand and I turned to I look at her. I had never seen her eyes before. Wide like the ocean and vivid like its waves. In the silence of nature, I could hear the same breathings which I had heard in our late night conversations. It was an open invitation. Her mounds wee still exposed. I bent forward, I wanted to kiss her. She took my arms around her waist and closed her eyes. But I could. “All of you are here because you came to know and love our Ernie, but you only knew the Ernie that came into being here, not the Ernie that some of us grew up with.” She stops to let that sink in while she watches many eyes go very wide when they wonder where she’s going. “I have to agree the Ernie we knew here is a great deal better than the Ernie I knew before he moved here, but I happen to know it wasn’t just the move. He lived in the house behind mine for the last few weeks of the school. She felt relief that he is dead and can't hurt now. She felt better, calmer and Safer and happy.She thought, 'I wasn’t good at being assertive, so his selfish, inconsiderate domination walked all over me. I was a living doormat. It’s not easy being a living doormat. Anyone woman who has attempted to survive such an existence will agree. I was resentful, exhausted, used up, abused and wounded. I did not feel loved. At the same time, I knew he needed me in his life because of my salary. I was. "Yup, good old light beer, drink two, piss four" I responded.The girls returned a few minutes later, visibly drunker, and carrying another box of white wine.It was now about 6pm, Greg fired up the grill and cooked a half dozen burgers for us.After we ate, everyone kinda settled down, I was ready to crash, Dawn and Shelly were pretty lit from all the sun and wine.I told Shelly I was ready anytime she was, she nodded yes and we said our goodbyes, exchanged hugs and headed back across the street.
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