I'm sorry for being this way, but what am I supposed to do? I'm pretty sure labotamies were not a thing for years. Anyways though, as for my girlfriend? She's a little sweetheart. I'll admit she is basically a smaller and nerdier version of my mother without the grays or extra color oh and the tan. Maybe it was a mental thing to want someone like my mom, at least in physical appearance.So... the day finally came when I went over to the mother's house to drop off a package. Guess she ordered. I wasn’t going to pee everywhere, that’s fucking gross. They either get the jokes or they don’t, not my problem if other people don’t have senses of humor.I washed my hands and came back to find Adelaide at the server’s station trading out her tablet for one with a fresher battery. I put my hands on her hips and my chin on her shoulder.“Hey babe,” she said. “They’re all in the back half.”“You’re our waitress?” I asked.“Who else?” She touched my jaw and kissed me. “Now go on. I’ll bring you. Ben is an extremely good looking guy. Standing about 5ft 9′, perfect features, piercing blue eyes and soft lips that you just cannot resist kissing. His body is to die for, toned and tanned from the summer days on the building site. In his spare time he plays football so his thighs are thick and muscley. His best feature however is his perfect cock, which when erect stands at a glorious 7 inches and about as thick as my wrist with a gorgeous mushroom head. I just couldnt take my mind off him in. I could have played poker in the salon, but the women would have still had nothing to do. Fortunately, I never had much use for poker, so I stayed with the women and we were bored, together.On the fifth day, the boredom left for good! We rounded a bend in the river and ran head on into a bunch of river pirates. We'd heard of them, but had dismissed them as some sort of joke intended to scare us newcomers. Well, let me tell you, river pirates were no joke!They started out by firing a.
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